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Darkseid is the guy who takes every donut out of the display at 7-Eleven, smells it, and then puts it back into the display case.
hashtag EWWWWW
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and don’t forget, it has been established that his hands are so dirty that they emit incandescent stink orbs!
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He is sooo gross. 
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I heard that Darkseid was the one who taught monkeys to throw their poop at people!
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new bombshell from a confidential source, quote
Darkseid was the one who taught monkeys to throw their poop at people!
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Anti-Life has been found!
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Those donuts look pretty good! I’d love to e-
“Darkseid smelled it.”
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Fun Fact: Darkseid is dependent on the JLA
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Not many people know this, but the real reason Doug Herman Side attacks the Justice League is to increase the value of his collectible action figures by raising their popularity.
DARKSEID IS in need of funds so he got a job at the only place that would hire him for minimum wage,
Darkseid has also mastered the big, friendly smile.
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He IS such a goober. 
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That’s what I’m sayin’. 
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(You didn’t hear it from me, but I hear Darkseid never lets anyone else carve the turkey)
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I believe it.
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and you say this is his birth name???
and he has one of those giant electric saw knives but he’s scared to turn it on so he just saws manually, takes forever
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Oh yeah, and all he talks about all night is how he wants a lightsaber to cut it when I hear he was even scared to use a blowtorch when they made Crème Brûlées.
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Desaad keeps bringing him lightsaber carving knives and he makes up excuses not to use them. “too pointy.” “not evil enough.”
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DeSaad even brought him a Darth Vader themed one once and he stated he couldn’t use it because “This is based off the Return of The Jedi one, not the Empire Strikes Back”
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