Ollie: Hey guys, today Hal pushed me, so I’m starting a kickstarter to put them down.
Ollie: The benefits of killing them are that I would get pushed way less.
2 Likes
Ollie: Are you alright with constructive criticism? I don’t want to sound mean.
Hal: No, go ahead. I want to hear it.
Ollie: It sucks.
Hal: That’s not constructive criticism.
3 Likes
Hal: There. How do I look?
Ollie: Like a cheap French harlot.
Hal: French?!
3 Likes
Hal, confused and exasperated: Ollie, how do you plan on telling a bear to go vegan?
Ollie: Politely
3 Likes
Hal: Ollie, is that legal?
Ollie: When there’s no cops around, anything’s legal!
3 Likes
Ollie: Everyone knows that Santa is an invention designed by the big five corporations to sell tinsel and video games to an unsuspecting public.
Hal: The whole “childhood wonder” stage just blew right past you, didn’t it?
4 Likes
Ollie: Hal, I need some advice.
Hal: You need advice from ME?
Ollie: Yeah, frightening, isn’t it?
3 Likes
Guy: closes a cabinet
a crash is heard behind the cabinet door
Kyle: What was that?
Guy: The sound of someone else’s problem.
3 Likes
Guy, watching Hal & Kyle panic : What’s going on?
John: Hal is having a midlife crisis and Kyle is just having a crisis.
3 Likes
Guy: Wow, this parking is as straight as I am.
John: I know I should be focused on the fact that you just came out, but HOW DARE YOU INSULT MY PARKING!
2 Likes
Kyle: Why does John always do the laundry so loudly?
Hal: So everyone knows that no one helps them out in the house.
John, in the distance: slams the washing machine shut
2 Likes
John: I currently have 7 empty notebooks and I have no idea what to put in them. Any suggestions?
Hal: Put spaghetti in it.
John: I am currently taking suggestions from everyone but you.
Kyle: Put spaghetti in it.
John: I am currently taking suggestions from everyone but you two.
Guy: Put spaghetti in it.
John: I am no longer taking suggestions.
4 Likes
Diana: Strange, in most circumstances, men cannot set foot on the island
Hal, in denial: huh, weird
Hal Jordan, five years later, waking up in a cold sweat: W A I T
(inspired by a tumblr post I saw a while ago)
4 Likes
Ollie Queen, addressing the Teen Titans: I know we all just went through a Major L. And I understand a lot of you may be feeling Misunderstood On Main, or even a little sus of your teammates. I think we can all agree that was A Big Yikes. But sometimes the best thing to do is to yeet away the past, and move forward. Because all of you Have Main Character Energy. You are my #fam.
2 Likes
I feel like that would be more Dick than Ollie
2 Likes
I can imagine Dick announcing that to the Batfam after a failed mission lol
2 Likes
I was thinking like Arrow Dad earnestly trying to Connect With The Youths and Roy’s in a corner dying of embarrassment
3 Likes
How the GLC would respond to you asking for their pronouns
Hal: “Uhhhh whatever you feel like buddy.”
John: checking his notes “…he.”
Guy: “I’m a dude.”
Kyle: “He/him/his, what about you?”
Simon: “What.”
Jessica: “She/her, thanks for asking!”
4 Likes
Dinah: Did you wash the dishes?
Ollie: I thought you wanted to do that…
Dinah: chuckles You were WRONG .
4 Likes
Roy: Aww, what’s your dog’s name?
Ollie: Spartacus.
Roy, yelling to Dinah: TRY SPARTACUS!
Dinah, on the computer: DIDN’T WORK!
Ollie:
Roy: What’s your favorite number?
5 Likes