Why should I be worried about the nose? I’m more concerned about the “killer handshake gag” his ad promises.
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“No one cared who I was until I put on the mask.”
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Cause now he mostly ends people
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Anyone know who someone would hypothetically have to talk to get hired by the Penguin? Asking for a friend. A hypothetical friend. Totally not asking for myself or anything.
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I got you.
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Cool, cool, I will my friend will be super thankful
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Anyone else notice how beautiful the flowers are this time of year? I didn’t realize until I met this gorgeous redhead. Her name is Pamela and we’re going to get married once I give her all of my money and become plant food. I normally wouldn’t do any of that but she is a very good kisser.
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I’ve heard her ex carries a Mallet, and knows how to use it. Be careful.
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Yikes!
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I heard they were married! 
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They are. Apparently these two hit bumps in the road of their ship from time to time and then a few days later they’re right back together. Frankly, I love these two and am kinda’ glad they’re here in Gotham. 
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Gotta run, I think I just hit Joker in the marbles.
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Using vampire bat DNA as a supplement didn’t work out like I hoped but the good news is I have an awesome pair of wings and blood tastes pretty good. Did you know you can get blood from anyone? Even your enemies?
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Or you can just buy a blood bank. They are practically giving them away in exchange for a few million dollars. Unfortunately they keep dropping cherry juice all over me.
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Oh, great Batman has gone suckhead.
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Stumbled on an old campaign pamphlet from Harvey Dent’s run for DA and I think there’s some red flags here. Why didn’t this get more attention?
“The corrupt political establishment wants you to think Harvey Dent spent time in a mental hospital. That is a lie. Harvey was only involuntarily observed for 48 hours after an unfortunate prank gone wrong in law school. Did Harvey black out and beat up a classmate who kept bragging about his higher test scores? Who knows? Harvey doesn’t remember and even if he did, Harvey learns from his mistakes. He now knows anger is a human emotion that must be locked away forever. What do you have against anger? Vote for Harvey so Gotham can change forever.”
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Thankfully Cobblepot didn’t go fully authentic on The Iceberg Lounge
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He did when I was there.
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Must have been a lot of slipping
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