Fourth World Problems: Jars on Apokolips

Apokolips has always seemed like the type of place where perishable goods go bad quick. Isn’t the planet essentially on fire? That is not good for helping things last. I imagine they jar and can a lot their food to make it last, but darn it, no matter where you live sometimes jars are just hard to open. I imagine Desaad to be the Darkseid crony that has the most difficulty with this.

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This guy and his mallet can open any jar.

Whether Desaad wants the jar in pieces or not, that’s another story.

I believe Gallagher is an emissary of Darkseid. Along with his slightly more evil sidekick, Carrot Top, they smash our sense of humor into tiny particles. As a mallet does to a watermelon.

Apicklips.

I like you, jd. jdeb. jdebo.

“Can’t you just like, I don’t know, Anti-Life Equation it open?”

“DOESN’T WORK LIKE THAT!”

“Come on, Darkseid. Pleeeeeease?”

“SILENCE. GOLDEN GIRLS IS ON… hehe, Rose burned you good, Dorothy.”

“What was that?”

“NOTHING. BACK TO OPENING THE JAR NOW.”

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Batwing52 I knew Golden Girls originated on Apocalypse. That show is evil. Even the theme song is evil

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Apicklips: the discerning Apokaliptan’s pickle.

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@msgtv Carrot Top is an Apokoliptian creation.

His trunk is actually a very large Mother Box that opens a Boom Tube whenever he needs more props.

Gallagher vs. Darkseid is the comic book we need but don’t have.

“Hey, tall, dark and ugly! You want to smash some FRUIT?!”

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“Even with all this accumulated knowledge, you’d think these dummies could open a jar?”

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