Real talk. It’s totally paywalled now.
IKR?
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Guilty pleasure: The anti-Superman editorial cartoons, done by some guy named Schmex Schmuthor.
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Oh my favorites are by Linda Lake
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Doesn’t she also write that romance novel series about Superman and some mermaid? Lori, maybe?
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Yeah. She writes some fanfiction too i think
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Oh, no, back when Lex Luthor was the president, he made it legal for Superman to be used in fictional works, because he’s a historical figure, and part of the public domain.
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Makes sense! Still weird what people do with him though on Archive of our Own…
(@basicallytimdrake knows what I’m talking about unfortunately)
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Let me ask you guys this – what’s worse: Superman throwing the car you’re still making payments on at the giant robot that was attacking Main Street, or Superman throwing said car and missing?
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Missing 100%.
I mean Lex is right! Everyone’s always saying “Superman’s a hero for all!”
Tell that to the people living on the streets because we have to pay for the things Superman broke!
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Guys- I was just pulling a load from the dryer when what I thought was just normal static electrcity charging through my clothes turned out to be a REAL HUMAN BEING. When I dumped the clothes out on my bed to fold them the snap crackle and pop of the static was louder than usual and then BAM- there was a woman with bone white skin and blue hair dressed in a leotard with a lightning bolt down the front and some spiffy thigh high boots standing right in front of me. All she said was " ‘Sup." and then just like that she vanished. Her voice sounded really familiar tho, kinda’ like Lori Petty from Point Break. Weird.
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That might’ve been my sister. She’s in this goth magician phase. I’ll yell at her later
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Your name wouldn’t happen to be Zachary, would it?
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Nope. It’s Sebastian. Sebastian Sanger
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Okay. I see no problem with that and definitely won’t regret talking to you in the future.
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This morning at Jurgens Park there were TWO sets of fake Jor-El and Laras that showed up. They argued with each other and then flew off before Superman arrived.
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As an authentic citizen of Metropolis, I don’t understand why people are always knocking LexCorp. Sure, they can be a bit heavy-handed, but at least they’re human. Everything about them is human. This message was written by a human. Give your moneys to LexCorp now.
This automated message has been provided by LexCorp. LexCorp is not responsible for any injury/death/illegal experiments/tragic fate that occur to you or your loved ones as a result of giving money to LexCorp.
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Bob: Hey Mike. It’s a beautiful day in Metropolis! What should we do on our day off?
Mike: We could see a movie?
Bob: Nah, the theatre district is in the part of town that Brainiac trapped in a bottle.
Mike: We could probably get tickets for the Meteors.
Bob: Away game. Stadium is still under repairs from the attack from Doomsday.
Mike: Bowling?
Bob: Superman accidently sent the bowling alley to the Phantom Zone when Zod was in town.
Mike: Laser tag?
Bob: Hostile takeover by Lexcorp
Mike: The Circus?
Bob: Mr. Mxyzptlk. Don’t ask.
Mike: Organic farmers market?
Bob: Lobo.
Mike: Ride bikes in the pa–
Bob: Toyman.
[Long pause]
Mike: Thai food?
Bob: Peanut allergy.
Mike: I hate you.
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